Energy Vampires & The Empath

I don't like the term "energy vampire", but I know folks search for it online because us sensitive types can pick up E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G around us. The good, the bad, and the downright icky! 

Some people are born more “porous” to the energy of the people, animals, plants, or even inanimate objects around them. It can be part of our life purpose to do so. It allows us to “read” the energy at play, which can provide a wealth of information. It can allow us to understand others and situations better if we are able to "see" what's really there, what we are perceiving that falls just outside the radar of most others.

Illustration Loop GIF by James Thacher

A friend of mine can pick up energy left in the furniture that others have used. She is able to read and discern themes and issues the previous owners had or still have by tuning into the energy that's been left in "things". 

When we pick up on the energetic pattern of an imbalance, blockage, or some kind of suffering around us, we may be able to become an agent of change. By moving the energy in some way, transmuting it, we can help facilitate a positive energy shift for all involved.

We may also be able to use our own empathy to heal those energetic hurts that are identified, with compassion. This is what EMPATHS are born to do!

But what happens when us sensitive peeps absorb negative energy from our environments and subsequently feel terrible?







or Negative Thoughts that don’t feel like your own!

What is that?!

Those negative feelings and thoughts may not even BE your own, but instead you may have picked them up from your environment, often from another person! And, why wouldn't this “other” want to hand off some of this negativity? It feels terrible to them too!

These so-called energy vampires may unconsciously seek your help. They may want you to empathize with them- to feel how badly they are feeling - and be too stuck to make a change, too overwhelmed by it, attached to it, or conditioned to carry it on from a long line of suffering generations. They may not know they're doing it but you are picking it all up on your Empath Radio Station! 📻

Being an Empath can also be difficult when bystanders don't pick up the energy that we do. We may ask them if they noticed a negative vibe in the environment and they may blow it off or think we are even a little crazy. This can be so invalidating and can even make us feel crazy.

But what you are picking up, dear Empath, is REAL. And it requires real boundaries.

Boundaries are essential when you're very sensitive. Overtime, the sensitive empath can unknowingly attract quite a following of energy vampires. They can even get stuck in these relationships for years, becoming overly identified with the role of caretaker, or believing they somehow deserve to be run dry. But as we learn and grow we can become aware of this unhealthy dynamic and make more conscious choices about who surrounds us with AND pay more attention to our own needs for centering, restoration, and other forms of self-care.


Do a clearing. If you do some intentional clearing after an entanglement with negative energy that's not your own, you can get back to your personal center. Imagine pulling your energy upwards using a strong stance. Breath in deeply, and hold the unwavering intention that you are centered and strong. As you stand, picture your life force becoming activated and expanding from your core and outward into a sphere of light around you. Now, imagine combing through your body and energy field for any dark, stuck or heavy energy. As you find energy that isn't yours, isn't what you choose to carry see it releasing and floating away from you. Anytime you wish to strengthen your energetic boundaries, use this method. 

Talk it through with a friend. Voicing what you are feeling to a trusted listener can help you gain more clarity about what is actually happening - that the energy might not be yours, what the energy you pick up is "saying" and what is the best action for you to take. Often the answer to that question is to send positive energy back to the sufferer and then release yourself from the entanglement. 

Get it out of your system and into your journal. This is the same routine as talking it out with a friend, only your journal becomes the friend. Note that you may have to "throw it up" first into your journal - all the ickiness that you feel and the confusing sensations and thoughts...and then only after that, sort out what's what. Just allow yourself to vent it all out, and often a clearing with follow, illuminating the truth that lies beneath.

Do some movement with intention. Decide that you are going to "shake it off" and set yourself on a brisk walk outside, taking lots of death breaths. See the energy moving out of your system as you do, perhaps imagining dark colored energy releasing from the tight spots in your body, and then moving out of your whole system with each deep breath. You can do the same with dance or yoga, or any other form of exercise.

Meditate. Use any meditation form you are familiar with that helps you release tension and negativity. Feel free to use my audio recording to help you get better at meditation, self-compassion and finding your Truth. (See below for Soul Touchpoints). 

Let your creativity set you free. Get out paper and colored markers, crayons, or pastels and start to draw a circle, a mandala perhaps. Set an intention that you are using this practice to release and clear yourself from any negative energy that you have absorbed, which does't belong to you. Use colors to represent that negative energy and draw it leaving the circle. Perhaps create a new mandala or circle that represents YOU after all the dark energy has left. You can also be guided by Adrienne in her Connecting to Your Soul's Joy exercise (see below).

Seek out an energy worker or therapist. It may be very helpful for you to establish your own personal support and guidance. Find a therapist or energy worker who is experienced in this realm.

If you want to get started with some of these techniques and would like more guidance, sign up for your free mini-course, Soul Touchpoints. The lessons are all prerecorded and will come to you in email form: Free Soul Touchpoints Course

With practice, you will be able to benefit more from your Empathetic Super Power. You'll be able to understand the dynamics at play with great insight. You'll be able to grow from those experiences and keep yourself on the empowered side of being a healer.

Nicole MacDonald is the Co-Founder of The Loveliness.
She is a licensed therapist and herbalist, and enthusiast of all things Spiritual. 

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